Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Goodbye, Childhood


Here is an absolutely brilliant song from the West End's Matilda the Musical.  Please keep this song in mind as you read through this post ...

Today was the first day of school for thousands of children in Nebraska.  They got their "First Day of School" outfits all ready to go, lined up their notebooks, pencils, and crayons, and headed off with a horrible sense of dread as nine months of school looms ahead of them.

And I laid on my bed watching anime, counting the minutes until I had to go to work.  Is this what being an adult is like?

I miss sitting in classes for eight hours a day, eyes glued to the clock waiting for the bell to ring.  I miss the anticipation of tests and accumulation of homework.  I crave the lunchroom atmosphere.  I want to be surrounded by hundreds of other teenagers again.  I miss band.  I miss drama.  I miss show choir.  I miss my friends.

How will I ever move on from the glory days of high school?  That's the place where I shed the skin of the socially awkward pre-teen and acquired the shining fairy-like personality I am known for today.  High school is where I met the most important people in my life.  It's where I made memories that changed my life.

I believe I should tell a story now.

When I was in middle school, I was having a hard time adjusting to a new disease, my parents' divorce, and a completely new social environment.  I had very few friends, I spent many lunchtimes alone, and gym class was a nightmare.  It stayed this way for three years, and when I think of middle school, I see only a depressing cloud of gloom.

When I was about to enter the ninth grade, I had a dream.  I wanted to be popular.  Not the brain-dead pack of mindless zombies commonly referred to as "popularity," but the girl who could be friends with everyone, regardless of age or social stamina.  I wanted to be surrounded by people I loved and who loved me in return.

Starting from the very first day of high school, the sun peeked out from behind its dark cloud.  I met some fantastic people immediately who I will be forever grateful towards for accepting me into their tight-knit group and for being my best friends even today.  Then, I joined band, orchestra, color guard, and the drama club, and the sun only became brighter.

During Homecoming of my Sophomore year, I found that my dream became a reality.  I danced my way around the floor with the ability to greet and hug people all throughout the night.  My younger friends looked up to me, and my older friends accepted me.  It was truly a dream come true.

Every year, I opened up, made many friends, tried new things, and let who I was really shine through instead of subduing it.  My friends and experiences in high school gave me the confidence to go for my dreams and move to New York.

And now that it's the first day of the 2014-2015 school year, my high school career is officially, completely over.  I'm all grown up, or so everyone seems to think.  In reality, I will never be grown up.  In my heart, I will be twelve years old forever.

Back to the song ...
"When I grow up, I will eat sweets every day on the way to work."
"When I group up, I will watch cartoons until my eyes go square and I won't care, 'cause I'll be all grown up."
"When I grow up, I will be brave enough to fight the creatures that you have to fight beneath the bed each night to be a grown up."
The kids describe being a grown-up as doing the things that children do, but as adults.  Isn't this the way we should all think?  Everyone should put the innocence of childhood into their everyday lives.  After all, it's the only way I will be happy in the years to come.  Wouldn't it make you happy as well?

Wishing you all the best happiness,
Little Me

P.S.

TO-DO List:
  • Sign up for singing lessons for the rest of the summer.
  • Learn routine for Aunt Molly and Friends ON ICE
  • Work hard!
Money Saved: $129.60

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